"I Will Choose Him Again"

This page has been more poignant to me than I could have imagined. It has brought me comfort and peace, and enlarged my faith. We don't ever plan on walking through a crisis of faith with someone very close to us. We don't plan on having our beliefs challenged by those we thought were on the path with us. It's hard to not have the answers to their questions. I've found myself wondering, "what if they're right? Have I been following blindly, without thinking for myself? Am I being scammed, played, defrauded?"

But every time these thoughts come to my head, they are pushed out by the title of this group. I choose to believe. No one is pressuring me, tricking me. I choose this gospel.

Those thoughts are pushed out by an inspired primary song. "Even though it's still hard, with questions that arise every day..." Or "I will choose him again! For he's our Savior and Friend..."

When I feel like things around me are crumbling, peace blossoms when I feel the sunshine in my face. I see those poor crunched tulips that I ran over bloom with bright confidence, not caring what other people might think of the way they are growing.

Joy bubbles through the doubt when my toddler finally convinces me to jump on the "twamp" with her, even though I know I'll probably pee my pants doing it.

Every one goes through trials. Everyone has questions sometimes. But I am so grateful for these tender mercies from a loving heavenly father. These little fireflies of assurance are just enough light in the mist of doubt and depression and darkness to remind me that I DO have a testimony of my own. There are questions and doubts that arise, but every time they do I get one of these little flickers reminding me that Heavenly Father knows as loves me. And then, again, I choose to believe.

~Kim Porter